Going through breast cancer treatment can be exhausting and never ending. There are so many ways you can help a friend or family member with their journey. Rather than saying ‘let me know if you need anything’, be proactive and anticipate what she might need. She has enough on her mind and may not want to ask.
HERE ARE SOME OF THE WAYS YOU CAN HELP:
- Make wholesome meals for the freezer. She might not eat them but she’ll be so appreciative when it comes to feeding the family or her partner.
- Drop off some baking.
- Suggest a walk. This will be in her time and at her speed and she may get exhausted very quickly, so be patient.
- Learn to listen. Your friend might repeat the same questions whilst she is in decision-making mode and just need a sounding board rather than advice.
- Take your friend’s children for a while, particularly over school holidays when they are spending all day at home and your friend feels unwell.
- Shop for groceries.
- Drive your friend to appointments.
- Take notes at these appointments so your friend can go over them later. There is so much information to absorb from the medical team that she’ll have difficulty remembering everything that was said.
- Collect prescriptions.
- Organise a movie night with girlfriends.
- Offer some books or magazines.
- Ask her partner out for a meal, or a drink, especially on those days after chemo. Partners often need a change of scenery, conversation and an opportunity to share how they are coping/feeling. The spouse/partner is often forgotten as all focus is on the ‘patient’ – so reach out to them often.
- Know that sometimes your friend may not want help and that is okay too.
- Don’t forget your friend half-way through treatment. Initially friends and family rush in to help, but breast cancer is a long road and people can get ‘help weary’, so work out a roster with her friends and check in with each other from time to time.