Personal boundaries are the limits and rules we set for ourselves in relationships. Whether that’s in a loving relationship with a partner, your children or at work. A person with healthy boundaries can say ‘no’ to others when they want to without feeling guilty.
Living a healthy life can’t exist without creating personal boundaries.
If you have difficulty saying no, have a tendency to want to please others, or find yourself being bothered by someone who is demanding, controlling, critical, pushy, abusive, invasive, pleading, or even smothering you with kindness, it’s your responsibility to speak up.
A person who always keeps others at a distance (whether emotionally, physically, or otherwise) is said to have rigid boundaries. Alternatively, someone who tends to get too involved with others has porous boundaries.
TheripistAid.com explains the common traits of rigid, porous and healthy boundaries below in this helpful table.
It’s important to note that the majority of people will fall under a mix of the above categories and just because you have healthy boundaries at work doesn’t mean you’re going to have healthy boundaries in your romantic relationships.
There are SIX main boundaries we need to be aware of in order to know where we sit in the above table.
Physical boundaries refer to personal space and physical touch.
Intellectual boundaries refer to thoughts and ideas.
Emotional boundaries refer to a person’s feelings.
Sexual boundaries refer to the emotional, intellectual, and physical aspects of sexuality.
Material boundaries refer to money and possessions.
Time boundaries refer to how a person uses their time.
Learn more about various boundaries from this article.
So with all of this in mind, are you setting healthy boundaries in your life?
What areas in your life require your attention regarding setting boundaries?
Remember that noticing and communicating boundaries is a practise – for all of us.
The more aware we are of our own feelings, thoughts and capacity, the better we can get at creating a safe space within and around us.