Valentine’s Day can bring up conflicting emotions for many of us. There are a lot of reasons why Valentine’s Day can rub us up the wrong way. Maybe you’re the giving one, doing special things for your partner, but never getting what you want in return. Maybe you have a partner that doesn’t believe in Valentine’s Day – but, it would be nice to be spoiled on this day for once because it is important to you.
Maybe you’re the one that doesn’t believe in Valentine’s day or you want to get away from it and everywhere you turn there are Hallmark cards and advertisements shoving it down your throat. Maybe the romance in your life just isn’t cutting it right now.
Whatever is present in your life, why not use this Valentine’s Day to show yourself a bit of love and appreciation? Here are some ideas of how to show yourself some love this Valentine’s Day.
Direct that loving energy towards yourself
Have you ever gone all out on Valentine’s Day for a special someone? What thoughtful acts of love did you do? What lengths did you go to, to make that person feel special? What if you turned that energy towards yourself? It can be easy to forget our own needs when we have jobs to do, people to look after, mouths to feed. Our needs can easily get left at the bottom of the priority list. Think about all the energy you are capable of giving to another person you care about, turn that around and direct that same level of appreciation towards yourself. If you were to match that amount of care and attention, what would you be giving to yourself on Valentine’s Day? What would you do if you were taking yourself on a date or going all out for you?
Spend it how you want to
Spend Valentine’s Day how you want it, regardless of anyone. Set your own expectations of how you want your day to be and create the perfect day for yourself. Spend it like you want to, whether that’s doing something enjoyable, a bit special or simply giving yourself a plain old break and ordering dinner rather than cooking it. Rather than focusing on what might not be happening on Valentine’s Day or waiting for that special someone to act, think about what is in your control, take charge of your day and own it. It’s a lot more fun to set yourself up with an enjoyable day and if some romance happens to come your way, that’s a nice bonus.
Use your voice
Yes, we all want a partner that is intuitive and can proactively recognise our needs and meet them automatically. But not all people are mind readers and some partners need a helping hand. Is this an opportunity to talk about wanting more romance in your life, or a special time to connect with your partner? It’s important to voice our own needs so that we keep the lines of communication open and give our partners the opportunity to come to the table rather than being resentful and disappointed. Make it easy for them. By expressing your needs in a relationship you are taking care of yourself and the relationship. Is there a way you could tell someone what you would like to happen to help make your day shine, rather than wishing they would automatically know what to say or do?
Spend it with the special people in your life
Who says you need to have a romantic interest to spend Valentine’s Day with in your life? Why not spend it with the people you love and care about who are already around you – whether it’s meeting up with friends for a nice meal or a glass of wine (yes, I know it’s on a Monday this year) or doing something special with your children or someone else close to you. Make a plan. Maybe it’s just picking up the phone and having a chat with a friend. We can all get too busy to catch up with friends and see how they are doing. Valentine’s day can be a reminder to connect with people you hold dear. Who says hearts need to be lonely on Valentine’s Day? You can make the day whatever you want it to be, the choice is yours!
Spread the love around
Sometimes doing something nice or special for other people can make us feel good too. Is there someone in your life that you can surprise with some feel-good Valentine’s messages? A few years back, my work colleague had just separated from her husband and one of her friends sent her a beautiful bunch of flowers on Valentine’s Day. It was such a lovely surprise and made her day, plus it was more than she had ever received on any previous Valentine’s Day and made her feel so special. Whether surprising a friend who might be missing home overseas with a call, telling your grandmother how much you love her or finding a small way to pay it forward on Valentine’s Day, this can help brighten our own day by making someone else’s.
Whatever you choose to do on Valentine’s Day take some time out to show yourself some love. Regardless of your relationship status or whether your loved one steps into gear or not, you still have the power to have the day you want. Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to practise self-care and put energy into spending the day just how you like it. Set your own expectations and make the decision to be kind and loving towards yourself. If you do find yourself feeling apprehensive about the 14th of February, remember the best way to predict the future is to create it. You have everything you need to create a loving Valentine’s Day for yourself.